I’m still not doing so well. Yesterday was pure torture, knowing me and my “boyfriend” are no longer together, yet will still sat and talked together like nothing happened. After class, he even said “I’ll stop by and see you after my other class”, to which I said “What? Really??”, and he said “Um… yeah.”. But then I wound up being pulled to a table with some close friends trying to cheer me up, and then my “boyfriend” sat with us (next to me). When he had to leave for the bus, he directly said farewell to me.
As if that’s not enough, today I wore a really nice black slimming long-sleeve with a nice scoop-neck, and My “boyfriend” couldn’t stop looking at me near the end of acting class…. I got lots of compliments on what I wore today, as well as what I wore yesterday. I’ll post pictures later. ;] But yes, and after class, One of my really close guy friends, Josh, hung out with me in the downstairs cafeteria for a couple of hours, and a little before he had to leave, my “boyfriend” comes walking up and is giving me his famous “you’re here!” glare (it’s a teasing glare). He didn’t stay, but went upstairs in the cafeteria lounge.He’s still up there as I type, and I can barely see him as I crane my neck to look above and back beyond the overhanging balcony. One of the things he said really doesn’t add up to the entire dumping thing… in fact, nothing does! One of my close girlfriends, Kattie (like Cat-y) is going to confront mister and talk to him seriously. I hope that goes well. Those two are also pretty close friendship wise, since they’ve been in a few plays together, we’re all in drama club, we were in last quarter’s drama class, and then Kattie and I were in Fall quarter’s drama class, too…. and Kattie was really the one who got me and my boyfriend officially hooked together, even though we have our own opinions.
So…. yes. And now I’m waiting. And I’m finally eating something (see how that goes). Ugh, it’s the first thing I’ve eaten since Friday afternoon. So my body is feeling very weird period. It’s an Odwalla Protein Bar, the flavor being Super Protein bar. The cereal crunch and the plump raisins are superb, and you can taste the nut butter in there. Yummmmm. It’s my favorite flavor, besides the Chocolate Peanut-Butter Chip protein bar (which the concession bookstore at the college has been out of for three weeks! :’( ). Anyhoo, seeing if I can keep food down or if I’ll be too upset again and puke it up. We’ll see…..
Last night I couldn’t get to sleep, so I cam down stairs around 1:35 A.M., turned on my laptop, and watched “Titanic”, which if you didn’t know, is my favorite love movie (even though I really don’t believe in favorite movies). That was hard to watch, so painful. My boyfriend reminds me so much of Jack, and I love Rose’s character. It would be my dream to star as Rose If a re-make of Titanic were ever possible. Just to prove how much I love Titanic, this is what my “boyfriend” and I did during our performance finals last quarter after putting all our scene props away (photo credit goes to Josh).
It’s so painful to think that he and I are not a couple anymore. I still think he has something else going on in his life that caused this sudden decision. I mean, he’s even fallen behind on the assignments for our Acting Styles class (mainly the written assignments; he hasn’t posted things that have already been graded!). It’s just not like him, to go back on his word. I just want things back the way they were, when everything was fine, and I never had to doubt for even a second if he loved me.
How has your week been so far?
With finals coming up, how do you make time for your friends/boyfriend/girlfriend?